Many times people who are struggling with 'religion' (which in my opinion, religion is a ploy the devil uses to confuse people seeking a relationship with Christ) and people who are asking a lot of questions about why this, and why that when conversation turns spiritual-it inevitably comes to this: Why does bad things happen to good people? How could a loving God allow such violent acts to occur to little children?
For years living as a christian, since 1976 when I accepted Christ as my savior, this was a question I asked myself too. I struggled with trying to figure out how to respond and how to justify when God didn't do what I thought He should have done, or react the way I was taught He should.
Oh, I knew He loved me, unconditionally-so much that He sent His own son, Jesus to the cross to pay the penalty of my sins so that I wouldn't have to, and so that I would go to heaven. The question asked of me when I was a child was "do you want to go to Heaven when you die?" Of course I did! But to a child, what is Heaven, but a distant place where God lived and 'good' people go when they die. The more I heard about this God, and His amazing love and grace for me, the more I knew in my heart He was real, and that I needed Him. That much I KNEW.
But-if you are taught wrong, you end up believing wrong. All those years, I grew up believing that somehow, when bad things happened to others, and then began happening to me-that it was part of God's plan. That it was His intent and will for bad things happen to teach us a lesson...that I had to trust God-that though I was living a life of pain, with many health complications and facing many surgeries, and eventually getting to the point where I couldn't even stand up straight or walk without excruciating pain and spent more time in a wheel chair than out of one-I was told that "His grace was sufficient-we can't understand God's ways...we have to trust Him-He has a plan; His strength will get you through this...God is using you as a witness to others while you suffer; to keep looking forward to Heaven when the pain and tears will be wiped away, etc".
I believed it; because it was what I was taught by my church. My scattered faith veiled my face, preventing me from seeing the true, genuine nature and character of God. So, I went on struggling, wondering why God would withhold His healing on me, confused why He healed others...and kept asking Him to help me get through the day.
You see, I was a person with immense faith. I clung to Him with every ounce of my being, and loved Him with all of my strength. I read the Bible, and memorized scriptures, and recited them to myself for encouragement when the days and nights were unbearable, and would cry myself to sleep, asking God for help.
Bad things happen-period. In this world, you WILL have many trials. Jesus Christ tells us this in John 16:33. He also said to take heart because He has overcome the world! And in Romans 8:37, He tells us we are MORE than conquerors through Christ who loved us! A friend of mine who witnessed many of my struggles with debilitating pain kept encouraging me to visit the church where she attended, where many people were experiencing miraculous healings like the Bible talked about. I wanted to believe her, but because of how I was taught in my own church, I thought it was a cult-type of church-after all, wasn't God done with the examples of healing and miracles? Wasn't that only for bible times? I was tired of struggling, tired of despair and hopelessness preached in my own church-tired of seeing depressed faces of worshipers who mirrored my own. Wasn't there more out there? Was I missing something? Where was the peace? Stay tuned for the next chapter...and know, God DOES have a plan, and it's a GOOD plan! Wendy
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